{"id":453,"date":"2008-12-20T19:58:41","date_gmt":"2008-12-21T00:58:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/index.php\/?p=453"},"modified":"2008-12-20T20:10:15","modified_gmt":"2008-12-21T01:10:15","slug":"we-have-entered-the-stereotypical-statistical-parenting-phase-of-our-lives","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/2008\/12\/20\/we-have-entered-the-stereotypical-statistical-parenting-phase-of-our-lives\/","title":{"rendered":"I have entered the stereotypical, statistical parenting phase of my life."},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I stood in line to pay $60 for the &#8220;hottest toy of the season&#8221;, Elmo Live.\u00a0 I also went in search of the best price on a Playstation Portatble (PSP).\u00a0 Then I bought the games, memory card and every other damn thing the sales kid told me I had to buy for it to work.\u00a0 I argued for an item in a toy store&#8230;and won.\u00a0 The smile on my face was quickly replaced with a blank stare as I realized my own mediocrity.<\/p>\n<p>Some ultra-wealthy parents buy their kids cars, apartments, ponies or spa memberships.\u00a0 And lots of ultra-granola parents buy their kids a tree to plant and a card memorializing the contribution made towards saving a gorilla in their name.\u00a0 Not me.\u00a0 I go straight for whatever I&#8217;m sold by the capitalist marketing machine.\u00a0 Stir the economy stupid.\u00a0 However there is one big difference in how I operated this year compared to the majority of American consumers: I paid cash.\u00a0 There will not be one credit card debt in our household as a result of this holiday season.<\/p>\n<p>So what if I bought my child portable attention deficit disorder (see PSP) when he didn&#8217;t even ask for it.\u00a0 I know he will wear the paint off the buttons.\u00a0 And if Logan only laughs at Elmo singing and dancing for 15 minutes well, that&#8217;s what I paid for.\u00a0 And don&#8217;t get me started on what I spent on Amy.\u00a0 She&#8217;s getting less gifts and for more money than either of the kids.\u00a0 If it wasn&#8217;t made by a brand name designer or personalized she isn&#8217;t getting it.<\/p>\n<p>Ya I&#8217;m a mediocre consumer drone and I don&#8217;t care.\u00a0 I give the gifts people want without pretending that I&#8217;m giving them something they need and won&#8217;t give a damn about.\u00a0 Christmas is about want, not need.\u00a0 Don&#8217;t ask me what I &#8220;need&#8221;.\u00a0 I&#8217;ll buy what I need.\u00a0 You get me what I can&#8217;t or won&#8217;t buy for myself (my dad is pretty good about following this rule).\u00a0 That&#8217;s the real spirit of Christmas, like it or not.\u00a0 That is unless you are the purist of Christian and genuinely celebrate the season based on it&#8217;s original intent.\u00a0 I don&#8217;t know too many of those people anymore.\u00a0 That is, I really don&#8217;t know anyone who would display the same &#8220;spirit&#8221; of Christmas without giving or receiving gifts.\u00a0 Do you?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I stood in line to pay $60 for the &#8220;hottest toy of the season&#8221;, Elmo Live.\u00a0 I also went in search of the best price on a Playstation Portatble (PSP).\u00a0 Then I bought the games, memory card and every other damn thing the sales kid told me I had to buy for it to work.\u00a0 &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/2008\/12\/20\/we-have-entered-the-stereotypical-statistical-parenting-phase-of-our-lives\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">I have entered the stereotypical, statistical parenting phase of my life.<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-453","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life","category-money"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/453","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=453"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/453\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=453"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=453"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/toddsingleton.net\/chronicle\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=453"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}